About Me

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I am a MATURE student in life and University. I am a mom to a 21 year old Daughter(How did that happen?) and university student. Mom to a busy 10-year-old boy. Wife of Jack-of-all trades for 29 years. Sister and friend to many. Sharon just lucky I guess.

“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” Oscar Wilde

"Be yourself; everyone else is already taken." Oscar Wilde

Welcome to my new and improved Blog.

I decided it was time for a change!

I write this Blog for me, no one else, just me. It is a way to think outloud, and to share my experiences with the world. Maybe some will be interested and some will not, and who knows, I might figure something out myself. I will talk about whatever comes to my mind, and sometimes it is hard for me to do, but I will do it anyway.

I enjoy photography so you will see a lot of my work. I love to read and you will see quotes from my favorite authors. Generally follow my life as try to obtain my undergrad in Art History and English at Carleton University.

Please read, enjoy and comment, open disscussion is welcome.

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Hope's Question Answered

Question: what was one life changing moment for you? Why?

I sorta go with the flow but I did realize after thinking about Hope's Question for a few days that there have been a few life changing moments in my life, but only one I can talk about.

Well today is a good day to answer this question. It's an Anniversary of sorts. March 15th, 1997 a day I will remember for the rest of my life. It was a day sort of like today COLD and snowy (although it was a blizzard that day ) And my whole world changed . Everything I knew or thought to be true had went out the window.

Jack and I had been trying for some time to concieve our second child. We started trying when Miranda was 3 and nothing had happened up until she was six. We were thrilled to see that I was Pregnant. Even though the line on the pee stick was faint and I was having major cramping and spotting. We had gone in to our local Hospital to have an Ultra Sound and a PG test. They said I had to go and see the family Doctor right after lunch without an appointment. I wouldn't let myself believe that something was wrong. Jack knew and figured it was bad and tried to prepare me, I wasn't willing to listen, I was just so thrilled to be finally PG after 3 years of trying. This was the day I was told that my Pregenancy was ectoipc. I fell through the floor. I was told I had to be rushed to another hospital to have emergency surgery to save my life! I couldn't believe that this could happen to me. WHY ME? My Mom had 5 kids and no miscarrigaes or anything of the sort. So I never though I would be any different. This was the day that lead me to believe that nothing is for sure. That one has no control or very little control over what happens in one's life. One has to go with fate and see where it takes you. And sometimes out of the bad comes alot of good. And some new things for your life!

Now how did this change me? Well alot of things happened at this time, too many to mention. BUT I think I grew up alot druing that time. I learned that most people can be kind and caring through all this and that some, some I did not expect, were thoughtless and cruel. Things I will never forget and have changed my relationship and how I deal with them in many ways. I was the talk of the town and people I didn't even know came up and said thoughtless things and I wasn't even in the mood to talk to them about my pain. MY very personal pain. I can talk about it now but it has taken a long time to get over that day. I think this has made me stronger in alot ways and it really has made me appreciate my kids more than I could have imgained. It made me watch how easily I make realtionships with people. I try to watch what I say so I am not thoughtless to others. Although sometime I fail and IF I catch myslef I will call and apologise for my thoughtlessness.

This road was not an easy one for me. I spent my 30's trying to get pregnant and have kids. I feel at time I put my life on hold to do this. Although my 30's were a blur I would not have done it any differently. I had planned to be done having kids by the time I was in my early 30's. I was 37 when Nathan came along. It took me another 4 years after the ectopic to have Nathan and many visits to specialists and a few more miscarriages and another ectoipc, worst than the first one. That one I was told I was a few hours from being in very serious trouble.

Jack and I wanted 4 kids. We are happy and Blessed to have 2 great ones. Maybe God or Fate knew what they were doing. Yes Nathan is an IVF baby. He was a struggle to concieve, he was a struggle from the day he was born (6 weeks early) and he has been a struggle every day since. BUT He is the most loving little boy when he wants to be and such a determine little guy at times. He challenges me on many levels all the time. Drive me insane at time. But then he can be my angel in disguise. He makes me laugh and he is pretty smart for a four year old. He amazies me with all he says.

I have made NEW friends all with kids that were a struggle to have Some did ivf, some adpoted and some got lucky and had them "The old fashion way" and it has been great to see them grow and change we have all shared the same adventures together. And I love them all dearly. I love how we talk about our kids all the time and with so much love, even the trying stuff. So out of all this pain, My life has changed and become enriched

So Hope that is one of my life changing moments. There are others but this is the one I remember the most.

What was your Life Changing Moment? Or one of them.


Hope said...

There are some similiarities in our stories that gave me shivers of deja vu. Thanks for sharing.
Life changing moments for me were certainly become a mom both times, but other such LC moments are small, that left me with a big lesson. Moments that have me share or receive compassion and empathy. Or teach me lessons about the simplicity of life and what is important.

moe said...

It will be so wondeful your son to know how MUCH he was wanted.

The two major life changes for me were my first pregnancy and first baby. Made me grow up a whole lot.

And meeting my husband. Yes they happened in that order. He was not what I expected but, exactly what I needed.

Anonymous said...

Thank goodness you and I both had similar life changing experiences, otherwise I would not have you in my life and I cannot even imagine what that would be like :)


Silver Creek Mom said...

Me either Anna, Me either.